Momism:  a statement that moms say, which they likely heard their moms say, that is meant to be instructional and motivational for family members, so the entire household will become more civilized. 

Momisms are generally based on mom’s, grandma’s, or great-grandma’s personal experiences.  As moms continue to pass-down to the next generation this important cultural legacy, they honor the sacrificial lives of those brave women who came before, women who shaped the family dynasties we enjoy today.

It is hoped that when daughters marry and become moms, they will continue the tradition of saying the same momisms.  It is hoped that when sons marry, their new wives will carry on the tradition, and possibly add more momisms to the family repertoire. 

In order for adopted children to feel as though they really belong in their forever family, it is often important to increase the number of momisms spoken to them individually on any given day.

Saying ‘Please’ at the beginning of the statement is optional, depending on how many times in one day a mom has had to say the same thing, to the same person.  Cursing at the end of the statement should be avoided at all costs, but is understandable, and the mom will most likely be forgiven of this transgression by other like-minded moms, if not by children and husband.

  • Please look at me when I am talking to you.
  • Use a full sentence when you answer me.
  • Leave a place cleaner than you found it.
  • If you see something needs to be done, then just do it.
  • If you use it up, replace it from stock, and write it on the grocery list.  
  • We live 30 miles from town, how could you NOT write toilet paper on the list?!
  • Don’t put too much in too small of a container.  (Thanks Grammy!)
  • Don’t just eat all of one thing; go around your plate in a circle, tasting some of each item.
  • In our home, we eat what is put before us.
  • Hungry children in the 3rd world would gladly give their bowl of rice for the food on your plate.
  • Don’t talk with food in your mouth.
  • Chew up your food all the way, then swallow before you take a drink.
  • Don’t leave your dirty clothes in the middle of the floor.
  • Don’t go to bed with gum in your mouth.
  • Peanut butter is really effective for getting gum off of sheets, pajamas, and out of hair.
  • Any two socks will do for the day.
  • What do you mean we are in town for the whole day, going into 33 businesses, and your socks don’t match?
  • Put down the toilet seat, and FLUSH the toilet after use.  Spray is available at the back of the toilet.
  • Look at the toilet before you sit down.  If you fall in the toilet, it’s okay to yell at your brother for leaving the seat up.
  • Boys need to go to the bathroom inside, just like the girls, whether we live on a farm or not.
  • When you use  the tree by the train track, zip quickly before the train passes.
  • When guests enter our home, you should stand up, turn off the electronics, and shake their hand.
  • Make sure your hands are clean and snot-free before you shake someone’s hand.
  • Use the back door, not the front door as it is for guests.
  • Take off muddy shoes at the back door.
  • It is rude to tell guests to take off their muddy shoes and go to the back door.
  • Expensive, clean ‘Town’ clothes and shoes are for town.
  • Dirty, hand-me-down ‘Farm’ clothes and shoes are for farm.
  • PLEASE don’t correct daddy when he wears farm clothes and muddy boots to town.
  • No running, throwing balls, skateboarding, or outside voices in the house.
  • Just because it is a bike helmet, doesn’t mean you can’t wear it for jumping on the trampoline. We can’t afford another broken nose.
  • If you scream, there better be blood.
  • If you don’t stop crying, I’ll give you something to cry about.
  • Spiders and snakes stay outside.
  • When mommy is on the computer blogging, DO NOT interrupt her to ask for snacks, or to resolve sibling disputes unless their is blood.
  • When daddy is on the computer, you can go ask him for anything so as not to bother mommy while she is talking on the phone.

Got any good Momisms in your family?